I am sad today....as I have been for the past few weeks.
I seem to be in a state of partial ennui. Work doesnt interest me-neither does anything else. I avoid talking to him-who loves me so much. I know I am causing him pain...but am not really improving on my behaviour. Mundane things disturb me like never before .And all the bigger aspects of life remain unattended to. Where on earth am I heading to?Pranayam doesnt comfort me today-the way it used to do earlier.
Am stressed for no reason...no cause...........why am I living in denial........
Maybe my friend is right-I need a break , a vacation....
Lemme post this before I feel too lazy and bored to do this:)
Monday, April 03, 2006
Wednesday, January 11, 2006
Shobha and Pooja
I generally surf through the TV channels while having dinner, yesterday while doing the same came across a very interesting program. Two pretty women having a debate over the treatment meted out to a underworld gangster!!! Shobha De and Pooja Bedi, both of them well known socialites and well known trendsetters in the fashion and glamour world in their respective eras. In fact there are certain similarities in the social conduct of Shobha and the late Protima Bedi-Pooja's mom.
So these two women came face to face on Pooja's show on a channel called Zoom and began discussing the hows and whys of Abu Salem's treatment in India and whether media was glamourising a criminal etc.For once I found myself agreeing to Shobha's thoughts .Having read a few of her novels-starry nights, socialite evenings,sultry days, each of them a biased sarcastic comment on Bombay Socialites, I have never considered her a "A" category writer. However for once I feel that she makes a strong point when she said that the media should not forget that the guy in question-Abu Salem is responsible for the death of thousands of people.Pooja tried to hold her fort for a long time trying to convince the other side that the right to freedom of expression cannot be denied to the media and basically the media are dishing out items that the public wanted. It was a nicely packaged , well directed interaction of two strong women who have led their lives independently and have despite the severe scrutiny of the media on their personal lives, have lived with dignity. A show where the host does not ask " So why did you stop being friends with Kareena Kapoor" , a show where an issue of national importance was discussed without any paraphernalia. Well Indian Television never ceases to surprise!!!!!
So these two women came face to face on Pooja's show on a channel called Zoom and began discussing the hows and whys of Abu Salem's treatment in India and whether media was glamourising a criminal etc.For once I found myself agreeing to Shobha's thoughts .Having read a few of her novels-starry nights, socialite evenings,sultry days, each of them a biased sarcastic comment on Bombay Socialites, I have never considered her a "A" category writer. However for once I feel that she makes a strong point when she said that the media should not forget that the guy in question-Abu Salem is responsible for the death of thousands of people.Pooja tried to hold her fort for a long time trying to convince the other side that the right to freedom of expression cannot be denied to the media and basically the media are dishing out items that the public wanted. It was a nicely packaged , well directed interaction of two strong women who have led their lives independently and have despite the severe scrutiny of the media on their personal lives, have lived with dignity. A show where the host does not ask " So why did you stop being friends with Kareena Kapoor" , a show where an issue of national importance was discussed without any paraphernalia. Well Indian Television never ceases to surprise!!!!!
Sunday, November 13, 2005
The way I know u
It's a journey-a long or short one as the case may be, We Call it Life.
It's 2.29 Pm-IST-Nov-14, 2005 and I am sitting in my cabin finishing off some work.
Ten years ago on this day I was writing my Board Exams. Twenty years ago I was celebrating Children's Day at School with many other children of my age, whom I called friends. Am not sure if I would recognise them if I meet them today and vice Versa. My journey is on........
Coming to the present , currently am employed with Microsoft and can call myself contented. Have a small group of friends here who make me feel good and cherished-I am like a Cat, need to have the feeling of security and comfort at all times else I feel disconcerted.So there is Anand and there is Gagan and there is Subroto and Neha and of course Asim. To tell the truth Asim is the only person with whom my interactions has stayed limited within the office. But that does not make our friendship either less or more. It was in the Cafetaria tht we met each other, His striking resemblance to Sameer Bhatnagar(my buddy from Bombay) was what made me notice him . And there has been no looking back ever since.......
Though I wouldn't like to be judgemental about anyone-there is something very interesting abt Asim tht makes him stand out amongst others-his straight-at-your-face honesty-its definitely a precious and rare attribute,and precisely the reason why I value his advise.There is another noticeworthy trait-He can laugh at himself, though there is no real need to:)
Well the bits and pieces of info that I have got , when I piece them together-I get the image of a person who is friendly and nice, helpful and cheerful, someone who has set standards for himself and lives by them, he can be friendly with people easily, but there is an inner sanctum of space where-in only very dear, very special people have access to-And they are called Friends.
It's 2.29 Pm-IST-Nov-14, 2005 and I am sitting in my cabin finishing off some work.
Ten years ago on this day I was writing my Board Exams. Twenty years ago I was celebrating Children's Day at School with many other children of my age, whom I called friends. Am not sure if I would recognise them if I meet them today and vice Versa. My journey is on........
Coming to the present , currently am employed with Microsoft and can call myself contented. Have a small group of friends here who make me feel good and cherished-I am like a Cat, need to have the feeling of security and comfort at all times else I feel disconcerted.So there is Anand and there is Gagan and there is Subroto and Neha and of course Asim. To tell the truth Asim is the only person with whom my interactions has stayed limited within the office. But that does not make our friendship either less or more. It was in the Cafetaria tht we met each other, His striking resemblance to Sameer Bhatnagar(my buddy from Bombay) was what made me notice him . And there has been no looking back ever since.......
Though I wouldn't like to be judgemental about anyone-there is something very interesting abt Asim tht makes him stand out amongst others-his straight-at-your-face honesty-its definitely a precious and rare attribute,and precisely the reason why I value his advise.There is another noticeworthy trait-He can laugh at himself, though there is no real need to:)
Well the bits and pieces of info that I have got , when I piece them together-I get the image of a person who is friendly and nice, helpful and cheerful, someone who has set standards for himself and lives by them, he can be friendly with people easily, but there is an inner sanctum of space where-in only very dear, very special people have access to-And they are called Friends.
Wednesday, August 31, 2005
And quietly flowed the tears...
It happens to everyone or so I was told.
Though the degree and intensity and even the reasons vary to alarge extent for different individuals.
It happened to me and I was caught unaware.
I thought I was brave , I thought i was immune to such weaknesses, but I was wrong. Oh I was so wrong!!! Years of failure and pain had taught me superficial indifference.It was my fear disuised as bravado that made me callous and careless I believe. My mistake!!!! Realisation dawned -It's nice to be nice to others-everyone. But not at the expense of your own happiness.But the deed is done, cant be undone.
But the pain remains, the hurt remains and oh the burden of having to keep a facade of normalcy. I wish I could just cry my heart out ,scream and let all the steam out of my system. Instead I remained at my desk, fighting back my tears, but they wouldn't listen. And quietly flowed the tears..........but nothing changed............
Though the degree and intensity and even the reasons vary to alarge extent for different individuals.
It happened to me and I was caught unaware.
I thought I was brave , I thought i was immune to such weaknesses, but I was wrong. Oh I was so wrong!!! Years of failure and pain had taught me superficial indifference.It was my fear disuised as bravado that made me callous and careless I believe. My mistake!!!! Realisation dawned -It's nice to be nice to others-everyone. But not at the expense of your own happiness.But the deed is done, cant be undone.
But the pain remains, the hurt remains and oh the burden of having to keep a facade of normalcy. I wish I could just cry my heart out ,scream and let all the steam out of my system. Instead I remained at my desk, fighting back my tears, but they wouldn't listen. And quietly flowed the tears..........but nothing changed............
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