Am tired of......

Am tired of-

1. Big huge, blunderous Phone bills for calls I haven't made

2. Being called a "Bubbly Cheerful Ever Smiling Gal" at work- Hello am much more than that

3. Being told to lose weight- Dont want to interfere with God's Scheme for me:)

4. Huge credit card bills-gosh why do they have to be so treacherous

5. Having to be politically correct

6. Not having enough money- just how much is enough:)I wonder......

7. Not getting enough time to spend with someone special

Well that's all I can think of now- it feels good to crib :)

Do Women make worse Bosses

It's a question that came to my mind- after reading to a lot of tales about women in power in different Industries and Functions- Are women in power and responsible positions obsessed with proving their mettle? Do they go on a overdrive leading to discontentment within their teams?Is it because they are still a minority that they suffer from insecurities ? Look at the examples below-

Pooja Bhatt- Director and Producer of Indian Feature Films- Nearly every movie that she produces/directors gets noticed because of some controversy with the staff-either the actors or the Film Crew- the nauture of complaints are nearly the same- Bad Behaviour, not keeping promises in terms of roles, remunerations, petty behaviour like chopping of roles etc etc. I am not sure though if this is a publicity stunt- if it is- it is quite a juvenile one which obviously doesn't seem to be working- given the box office results of her films

Ektaa Kapoor- Another one in the same or rather similar industry- She is the queen of Indian Television - and she demands attention apparently like a queen in ways that would put Cleopatra to shame.Apparently she dictates her staff about which informal gatherings they should attend or they shouldn't attend, replaces cast on minor disputes wihout any heed to contracts etc. Her recent appearance on a popular Chat Show with her "yes" Men in tow- kind of validated all the rumours- If I had a production house and was surrounded by cronies who say "yes" to everything I say- I would have drowned in embarrassment

Kiran Bedi- She has always made news for various resons and has always made us proud also. But at the same time there have been lesser known reports of her subordinates not being happy with her, her high-handedness has always been a corridor discussion in the IPS Cadre. What's more she is highly unapologetic about her behaviour and insists on it given the fact that she is the face of Indian Police Service( which is no mean feat by any standards of course)

There are numerous other examples from the corporate world that I keep hearing all the time-one in my org- a very simple one but very indicative
In a org that prides itself on being one of the first to introduce the "first name" culture- my female boss manages to get many of her reportees to call her "Madam" and is quite happy about it:)There are other 9 Directors in the org -all of them Male- have never heard anyone of them doing that- Even Gates answers to Bill:)))

Of course these are very few examples and I would be quite happy to know about instances contradicting my assumption:))

The Wonder Years

Today I came across several of my school friends' profiles in Orkut- and for a good twenty minutes my mind drifted back to the past- to those wonder years- when life was lived for its own sake-without any deadlines or purposes .....One of the benefits of living in a small town is the high visiblity and familiarity with each other. The school years-the large part of it spent in girlish leisure, discovering the joys of growing each day- I remember the first time I read a mills and boons in class 9 I think- i went to sleep dreaming of knights in shining armour....

There was this other incident I remember when I got a prize for embroidery and needle work- when I barely could manage to sew buttons on my shirt- it was the first time I won something which I did not deserve - the sinking feeling in my tummy did not subside- learnt a very important lesson that day- its important to earn success in order to be able to enjoy it- the sense of accomplishment doesnt come easy....

Exam results, competitions, debates, quizzes, petty quarrels, sharing tiffins, planning picnics-all those seem to be a part of an alien world now....Maya, Monika, Ananya, Tanushree-some of close friends then- are now completely out of my orbit- likewise I am for them....Maya fulfilled her dream of becoming a doctor, Monika is a banker, Ananya and Tanushree are homemakers and I drifted into the corporate world....and thus moved apart our worlds- once friends for forever...now good thoughts and memories in each other's hearts...

Such is Life.....

The pic

Against the backdrop of the setting sun and the shimmering lake-both of them stood...
And the moment was captured for ever- One standing gaunt, the years of experience lining his face, The other-a younger version, looking ahead with a humility that comes with realization of the twists of life.........
The writing on his T shirt stood out conspiciously-Santosa Island
How things get mixed............

Somebody Else's Kids-3

The problem that Ginny faced that nearly everyone she interacted with- forgot or ignored the fact that she was not quite like everyone and needed care and understanding- and that included me as well
So often we pay attention to visible disabilites- blindless, limps, deformation of limbs etc.
She had a brain malfunction- I dont quite remember what its called now
All I remember is she couldnt read remember or recognise words and letters
Dumb, Lazy, unfit, slow- these were some of her prep school teachers had labelled her
Failing in every test...her spirit never failed

Finally they brought her to me- Now I had 3 of them

The Difference Between Men and Women

I just HAD TO share this!!! It's NOT written by me but whoever wrote it did a brilliant job.
Let's say a guy named Fred is attracted to a woman named Martha. He asks her out to a movie; she accepts; they have a pretty good time. A few nights later he asks her out to dinner, and again they enjoy themselves. They continue to see each other regularly, and after a while neither one of them is seeing anybody else.

And then, one evening when they're driving home, a thought occurs to Martha, and, without really thinking, she says it aloud: "Do you realize that, as of tonight, we've been seeing each other for exactly six months?"

And then, there is silence in the car.

To Martha, it seems like a very loud silence. She thinks to herself: I wonder if it bothers him that I said that. Maybe he's been feeling confined by our relationship; maybe he thinks I'm trying to push him into some kind of obligation that he doesn't want, or isn't sure of.

And Fred is thinking: Gosh. Six months.

And Martha is thinking: But, hey, I'm not so sure I want this kind of relationship either. Sometimes I wish I had a little more space, so I'd have time to think about whether I really want us to keep going the way we are, moving steadily towards, I mean, where are we going? Are we just going to keep seeing each other at this level of intimacy? Are we heading toward marriage? Toward children? Toward a lifetime together? Am I ready for that level of commitment? Do I really even know this person?

And Fred is thinking: ...so that means it was...let's see...February when we started going out, which was right after I had the car at the dealer's, which means...lemme check the odometer...Whoa! I am way overdue for an oil change here.

And Martha is thinking: He's upset. I can see it on his face. Maybe I'm reading this completely wrong. Maybe he wants more from our relationship, more intimacy, more commitment; maybe he has sensed - even before I sensed it - that I was feeling some reservations. Yes, I bet that's it. That's why he's so reluctant to say anything about his own feelings. He's afraid of being rejected.

And Fred is thinking: And I'm gonna have them look at the transmission again. I don't care what those morons say, it's still not shifting right. And they better not try to blame it on the cold weather this time. What cold weather? It's 87 degrees out, and this thing is shifting like a garbage truck, and I paid those incompetent thieves $600.

And Martha is thinking: He's angry. And I don't blame him. I'd be angry, too. I feel so guilty, putting him through this, but I can't help the way I feel. I'm just not sure.

And Fred is thinking: They'll probably say it's only a 90-day warranty...scumballs.

And Martha is thinking: Maybe I'm just too idealistic, waiting for a knight to come riding up on his white horse, when I'm sitting right next to a perfectly good person, a person I enjoy being with, a person I truly do care about, a person who seems to truly care about me. A person who is in pain because of my self-centered, schoolgirl romantic fantasy.

And Fred is thinking: Warranty? They want a warranty? I'll give them a warranty. I'll take their warranty and stick it right up their...

"Fred," Martha says aloud.

"What?" says Fred, startled.

"Please don't torture yourself like this," she says, her eyes beginning to brim with tears. "Maybe I should never have...oh dear, I feel so..."(She breaks down, sobbing.)

"What?" says Fred.

"I'm such a fool," Martha sobs. "I mean, I know there's no knight. I really know that. It's silly. There's no knight, and there's no horse."

"There's no horse?" says Fred.

"You think I'm a fool, don't you?" Martha says.

"No!" says Fred, glad to finally know the correct answer.

"It's just that...it's that I...I need some time," Martha says. (There is a 15-second pause while Fred, thinking as fast as he can, tries to come up with a safe response. Finally he comes up with one that he thinks might work.)

"Yes," he says. (Martha, deeply moved, touches his hand.)

"Oh, Fred, do you really feel that way?" she says.

"What way?" says Fred.

"That way about time," says Martha.

"Oh," says Fred. "Yes." (Martha turns to face him and gazes deeply into his eyes, causing him to become very nervous about what she might say next, especially if it involves a horse. At last she speaks.)

"Thank you, Fred," she says.

"Thank you," says Fred.

Then he takes her home, and she lies on her bed, a conflicted, tortured soul, and weeps until dawn, whereas when Fred gets back to his place, he opens a bag of Doritos, turns on the TV, and immediately becomes deeply involved in a rerun of a college basketball game between two South Dakota junior colleges that he has never heard of. A tiny voice in the far recesses of his mind tells him that something major was going on back there in the car, but he is pretty sure there is no way he would ever understand what, and so he figures it's better if he doesn't think about it.

The next day Martha will call her closest friend, or perhaps two of them, and they will talk about this situation for six straight hours. In painstaking detail, they will analyze everything she said and everything he said, going over it time and time again, exploring every word, ex-pression, and gesture for nuances of meaning, considering every possible ramification.

They will continue to discuss this subject, off and on, for weeks, maybe months, never reaching any definite conclusions, but never getting bored with it either.

Meanwhile, Fred, while playing racquetball one day with a mutual friend of his and Martha's, will pause just before serving, frown, and say: "Norm, did Martha ever own a horse?"

And that's the difference between men and women.

Someone Else's Kids- 2

Ali-the other boy in my school- For want of a better word I use the word "school" its more like a care centre...
Ali-Ten, Brown, strong, with a vocabulary that has a expletive added with every 3 words

His file read-" Refugee from Bangladesh, illegal migration, 6 months back in a family scuffle, witnessed his mother stabbing his father with a knife, she is currently in custody as a undertrial"

While I droned about the ten commandments, Ali sang a hindi song in his childish voice......

Someone Else's Kids-1

"We did it when I was thirteen , he told me I couldnt get preganant...."

The little girl standing in front of me- 14, shy, catholic and pregnant, thrown out by her parents, brought to the institute and put under my care

She traced a small red mark on her arm- "I didnt like it much -it was painful"

I have often wondered how do big things of life fit in small discussions......

Message for my Guardian Angel

Paging for U- Where Art Thou....

I have landed myself in a mess again...

As my friend P told me- " Since the last 5 years that I have known u, Your ability to create virtual and real messy situations all around u makes me laugh as well as intrigues me"
Well that's an honest opinion....

If I were to rate ur performance rating -you would have been on ur way out....

On second thoughts - Had u done your job properly- Life would have been so bland....

For eg- I wouldnt have landed up at Howrah station at 10.00pm to catch a train scheduled at 9.50 pm and see it moving out of the platform right in front of me and me stranded there

Or I wouldnt have tried to help A and landed myself in trouble with her current boyfriend and my close friend S who is his ex-girlfried( such a small world!!!!)

Or I wouldnt have written a cheque for 5 Lakhs for my landlord when I owed him Rs 5000, what happened next is a nightmare-best forgotten

Well Well Well the list is endless.....

Currently I have gone and put my foot in my mouth again...so pls come back...I am putting u on a Performance Improvement Plan- consider this as your last chance of redeeming yourself in my esteem...

So long Buddy- Stay Happy.....

Regards
Mishi

Comfortably Numb-2

No one asked me what I want,I have got used to being unasked
Life continues to pass by through several years, experiences, moments, critical situations- all of these I scale through carefully ministered instructions.....

Controlled, clinical peace....

Comfortably Numb Again

An Ode to Long Distance Love

A long distance love can be lovely,

There’s passion and romance,

You can meet in new wonderful places,

You can wine, you can dine, you can dance.

Leave regular life far behind you,

No work and no phones and no bills,

This is the time for just playing,

No cleaning up messes or spills.

After the fun is all done,

Go back to your life and be you,

Stay in your boxers or sweats,

Be a slob, ignore the shampoo.

Yes, long distance love can be lovely,

When you plan it, the romance is there,

But the rest of life just isn’t bothered,

What a great way to spell love affair!

Comfortably Numb

It was the moment of truth, the realization hit her like lightning...

But the feeling was familiar- a sense of deja-vu,

It didn't hurt anymore- She has become Comfortably Numb

The Woman in your Life

Got this email from a friend and colleague- Thanks Neo:)




Very well written................Its awesome.. girls def u should read and feel proud.. guys read and understand


Here is a girl, who is as much educated as you are;


Who is earning almost as much as you do;

One, who has dreams and aspirations just as you have because she is as human as you are;


One, who has never entered the kitchen in her life just like you or your Sister haven't, as she was busy in studies and competing in a system that gives no special concession to girls for their culinary achievements

One, who has lived and loved her parents & brothers & sisters, almost as much as you do for 20-25 years of her life;

One, who has bravely agreed to leave behind all that, her home, people who love her, to adopt your home, your family, your ways and even your family name

One, who is somehow expected to be a master-chef from day #1, while you sleep oblivious to her predicament in her new circumstances, environment and that kitchen


One, who is expected to make the tea, first thing in the morning and cook food at the end of the day, even if she is as tired as you are, maybe more, and yet never ever expected to complain; to be a servant, a cook, a mother, a wife, even if she doesn't want to; and is learning just like you are as to what you want from her; and is clumsy and sloppy at times and knows that you won't like it if she is too demanding, or if she learns faster than you;


One, who has her own set of friends, and that includes boys and even men at her workplace too, those, who she knows from school days and yet is willing to put all that on the back-burners to avoid your irrational jealousy, unnecessary competition and your inherent insecurities;


Yes, she can drink and dance just as well as you can, but won't, simply because you won't like it, even though you say otherwise

One, who can be late from work once in a while when deadlines, just like yours, are to be met;

One, who is doing her level best and wants to make this most important relationship in her entire life a grand success, if you just help her some and trust her;

One, who just wants one thing from you, as you are the only one she knows in your entire house - your unstinted support, your sensitivities and most importantly - your understanding, or love, if you may call it.

But not many guys understand this...

Papa Kehte Hain

Heard this in a crowded Airport Lounge-

Son, someday you will make a girl very happy, for a short period of time. Then she will leave you and be with men that are tens times better than you could ever hope to be. These men are called musicians....


It is not the "right" or "wrong" of the statement that caught my attention- but the conviction in the voice-the conviction that stems out of years of belief and experience...the faith that moves mountains........

Macavity: The Mystery Cat

My FAV poem-wish I had a cat like this...sigh.....


Macavity's a Mystery Cat: he's called the Hidden Paw -
For he's the master criminal who can defy the Law.
He's the bafflement of Scotland Yard, the Flying Squad's despair:
For when they reach the scene of crime - Macavity's not there!

Macavity, Macavity, there's no one like Macavity,
He's broken every human law, he breaks the law of gravity.
His powers of levitation would make a fakir stare,
And when you reach the scene of crime - Macavity's not there!
You may seek him in the basement, you may look up in the air -
But I tell you once and once again, Macavity's not there!

Mcavity's a ginger cat, he's very tall and thin;
You would know him if you saw him, for his eyes are sunken in.
His brow is deeply lined with thought, his head is highly domed;
His coat is dusty from neglect, his whiskers are uncombed.
He sways his head from side to side, with movements like a snake;
And when you think he's half asleep, he's always wide awake.

Macavity, Macavity, there's no one like Macavity,
For he's a fiend in feline shape, a monster of depravity.
You may meet him in a by-street, you may see him in the square -
But when a crime's discovered, then Macavity's not there!

He's outwardly respectable. (They say he cheats at cards.)
And his footprints are not found in any file of Scotland Yard's.
And when the larder's looted, or the jewel-case is rifled,
Or when the milk is missing, or another Peke's been stifled,
Or the greenhouse glass is broken, and the trellis past repair -
Ay, there's the wonder of the thing! Macavity's not there!

And when the Foreign Office find a Treaty's gone astray,
Or the Admiralty lose some plans and drawings by the way,
There may be a scrap of paper in the hall or on the stair -
But it's useless to investigate - Mcavity's not there!
And when the loss has been disclosed, the Secret Service say:
`It must have been Macavity!' - but he's a mile away.
You'll be sure to find him resting, or a-licking of his thumbs,
Or engaged in doing complicated long-division sums.

Macavity, Macavity, there's no one like Macavity,
There never was a Cat of such deceitfulness and suavity.
He always has an alibi, and one or two to spaer:
At whatever time the deed took place - MACAVITY WASN'T THERE!
And they say that all the Cats whose wicked deeds are widely known
(I might mention Mungojerrie, I might mention Griddlebone)
Are nothing more than agents for the Cat who all the time
Just controls their operations: the Napoleon of Crime!

From Uncle Sam's Kitty

So Uncle Sam caught hold of me yesterday-

" Why do u always write fiction-55 with unhappy endings

" Well, er, um I guess I am usually sad when I write them"

"That is no reason- you should be able to switch off and think of variety, Art for Art's Sake"

So Uncle Sam in his great magnamity has shared some of his Fiction -55 pieces , Uncle Sam is unavilable for comments, you can give your comments to me instead-

....................................................................................

He left at 7 - a dark night in Wintry Delhi ..?He had been neglecting studies and acting suspiciously of late - going without notice for hours altogether but this was the limit! Tonight he will be questioned .. As the clock struck 10 and tempers mounted, a familiar voice came on the radio.

....................................................................................


She woke up, startled by the noise of a car driving off – next to her, the bed was empty, left warm by its tenant; she sighed and dozed off; no different from the others she thought.
She woke up, startled by the noise of a car parking …

....................................................................................
She woke up, startled by the noise of a car driving off – next to her, the bed was empty, left warm by its tenant; she tensed – her parents had told her to be careful with guys in the city - and sobbed hopelessly .. until she heard a car parking …

.....................................................................................

The noise woke her up; she gathered her slippers and rubbed her eyes - damned rats or the cat after the damned rats. She took her hairbrush and stepped through the kitchen door to see him standing at the stove – making tea. Errr.. I’m sorry I forgot your name from last night.. she blurted

.....................................................................................

Don’t push him – he’ll fall .. he shrieked, but Mamma said, not to worry dear, he won’t! But Dad was anxious, the branch his son was on was too tenous and quite high for his age when the inevitable happened

He flapped his wings furiously even as he fell and gained flight

....................................................................................


He kissed everyone just as he had thought, he collected the award with the right pose as the cameras clicked, the thank you speech was a resounding success and he walked back to his seat with elan as if it he received them all his life!! After all 5 rehearsals did count…

....................................................................................

He forgot the kisses he meant to give, he held the statutte too tightly on stage, he fumbled with his speech and went back to his seat thinking - all those preparations from the past 6 years were futile. Such moments deserve their spontaneity.

To my Friends

RT Called to advise me on the most imp decision of my life

PP mailed to say sorry

SB1 has become a imp part of my life

BS is single handedly responsible for my huge long phone bills( i hope he reads and recognises his identity:))

PJ and I call each other to check if the other is alive

SD is my best gal pal

RP my new female pal

SS Another alpha pal and colleague

SB2 calls me at weird hours to know my views of one night stands

GG threatens me with dire consequences if I dont call him every 3rd day

AM the crazy dude who thinks the world is crazier

So many friends -from different stages of my life- each of them has shared a part of him or her with me, and I have shared a part of me with each of them.....each of them responsible for contributing to how I am today.....an intersection of time, place and destiny resulted in me knowing each of u....Thank You friends for being there physically, emotionally, unconditionally for me...What would I do without you........

OH God forgive me when I whine
I have wonderful friends-And the world is mine:)

Hopes & Dreams

Do we always get what we deserve

Do we always deserve what we get

Here I am -trying to make a home out of nothing

From fragments of hope

And binding them together with Faith

I left my dreams somewhere far away

And lost a part of me- A part that was beautiful

I am mid-way and can't give up

It's the need and necessity that pulls me on

Somewhere this will end, Oh the Futility of it All

Someone waiting forever for someone who never comes home....

Why we "shout from the rooftops"

My friend asked me- "Why do you women need to shout from the rooftops about your independence and maturity -and the fact that you don't need a man to make you happy. Who's asking anyways and who's interested in what you women do".

Had this question come from a lesser man I wouldnt have given a damn to this thought, but he is one of the few guys I have met who don't carry old stereotypes and can accept mistakes without mincing words..so that set me thinking...and here is what I think could be the reason for what he calls us "we shouting from the rooftops"

1. We don't shout from the rooftops- to start off with- it's just that we are more vocal and verbose about our opinions-and why not- we think our opinions are not opinionated meaning they are not biased or based on seeing one side of the picture. We have been oriented to be neutral, level headed and truthful in every aspect and don't see the reason to hold back our views

2. The fact that we focus more on the man-woman relationship issue is because this is a huge grey area, with loads of things undefined especially in the urban scenario.While urban women have moved a lot and evolved in terms of their thought processes, perception, values etc, somewhr the urban young man is lagging in his ideas, most of them have used their education to enhance their employability , not their EQ. Most of them r still struggling to bridge the gap between what they have
seen as a part of growing up and NOW

3.Its also a fact that its no use "casting pearls before a swine"- In other words we also would not have wasted out time, effort, energies if we felt that it is falling on deaf ears or ears who can't understand or take it- So guys its actually a credit and a compliment to you- we think you can take a slightly bitter pill and accept a different side of the same story

So my friend if you are reading this- I hope I have been able to answer your query-If not .....please let me know your views....and let's take this further- nothing like a coffee and a discussion with an intelligent man:))

Tell Me....

Wat is worse- Living in a Euphoric state or living in a world of bitter truth???

IIMBians in Hyderabad

This weekend was the stuff nightmares r made of - or maybe bad dreams( i guess tht sounds better:))
Two of my friends-I call them Buddies descended on Hyderabad and life is never going to be the same for poor simple Hyderabadis:)...

Friend 1- Bibin

Friend 2- Peeyush

Duration of stay 2 days

Effect on Hyderabad- Wind, Storm, Rains, traffic Jams, Near riot conditions......

Some excerpts of our conversations-



Peeps-"Who drives a Red Santro- Let me hop onto a AutoRickshaw- Its more classy"

Peeps-" Geez there r so many people in Hyd- where do u get them from"



Bibs-"You call me to Hyd and make me drive 500 miles- at this rate I will reach Nagpur"


Bibs-" Hyd is doing really well -at this rate they will be as good as Bangalore in a Zillion years"



And there is this little baby who had the last word or rather the last expression- I AM BORED ..IIMBians am not impressed!!!!

And there was ME-having fun...........at all times....

Thanks a Bunch Guys.....

And Give Hyd some time to recover and we will invite U again:))

Small Things

The morning rush-hour, the huge traffic signal jams, the FM music blasting out from the cars and cabs, the honking, the cacophony of the fusion of the noises.......It was another typical day. He sat patiently, waiting for the traffic to move-she hadnt called till now- usually by now-she would have sent 2-3 messages and made atleast one call....
Other days he cut her calls after 2 mins saying "am driving"...
Today she didnt call- he waited patiently- the traffic moved

He kept wondering how do such small things fit into life's greater schemes and then become essentials.......

The imperfect boy

It was raining heavily. I needed a shelter, the book shop looked inviting. There he was seated at a corner-the imperfect boy with a perfect smile. He looked up at me and gave me a smile . I lost myself- the tears got a life of their own-it helped that my cheeks and face were wet already. A life of 5 summers spent without coordination-they call it Neuro Muscular Disorder - I call it God’s Mirthless Humour.........





>

The mother

"U do understand it -don't u, we have to do it"- That was her mother-in-law.

She knew it was useless to argue further.

"Don't worry it wouldnt pe painful or hazardous"-continued the MIL....

Well didnt she already know that- wasnt it the same last time as well.

She gave a sigh and took out her diary - The glossary of names that she had written-Amrita, Maya, Pritha, Supriya..... etc would now not be required-they would never be required.

As she tore off the pages- the loud conch shell noises and the beating of drums to the accompaniment of chantings of prayers from the neighbourhood broke out in the air - breaking her reverie.

Durga Puja is being celebrated as usual with great elan in - The Mother Goddess the symbol of strength and fertility........

The first Calvin & Hobbes strip

First published on November the 18th 1985 in the Daily. We discover Calvin and Hobbes, and Hobbes' love for tuna fish

Home they brought her Warrior Dead

Moments before the final assault Capt. Vijyant Thapar (Robin) left this letter at the war front base, to be handed over to his family.





AND AFTER THAT

HE CAME BACK HOME WITH TRI COLOR DRAPED







A Picture of Kargil

Physical abuse common in Indian children

Two-thirds of children are physically abused and more than half have faced some form of sexual abuse, in India, as stated in a study by the Indian government.

The study, backed by the U.N. Children's Fund and Save the Children, involved questioning almost 12,500 children and parents across 13 of India's 29 states, also found that 70 percent of children never reported the abuse they suffered to anyone.

While physical and sexual abuse of children is illegal in India, it is still prevalent in the home and in schools and especially among street children, working children and those in institutional care.

The study, found that amongst the children who were beaten at home, almost 90 percent of them were at the hands of their parents. Some 53 percent of children reported having faced sexual abuse. Half of the cases of sexual abuse were committed by persons known to the child or in a position of trust and responsibility.

Child rights activists welcomed the study, saying it was positive that the government was waking up to the reality. Homes, schools and neighbourhoods are not safe for children as most people don't even believe that hitting or sexually abusing a child is a serious crime.

Laws need to be strengthened and mindsets need to be changed if we are serious about protecting our children.

Interesting Opinion Polls

OPINION POLL


Q. Should controversy stop Salman Rushdie from getting a knighthood?
Yes
No
Can't say


Q Will the Deols prove as successful as Big B-Abhishek pair?

Yes
No
Can't say

Q Will Hamas-Fatah fighting undermine Palestinian desire for statehood?

Yes
No
Can't say

The Difference

"Why?"

"Because there is a difference between you and I"

"What Difference ? Don't Speak in riddles"

"I was ready to give up everything else for you and you gave me up for everything else-that's the difference"

The silence was loud.....

Single Ergo Happy:))

Once a woman hits a certain age, the race to the altar is on. With the pressure that society-not to mention friends and family-puts on us, it can feel like the worst thing in the world to be single. But not so! In this excerpt from The Bridal Wave, authors Erin Torneo and Valerie Cabrera Krause set all of us single women straight on why we should be living it up during our “me” years!

Sit Back And Enjoy!
For most of our adolescence we want to be older than we are: We buy Seventeen magazine when we're twelve, finagle fake IDs so we can get into twenty-one-and-over clubs when we're seventeen. Once we're in high school, we want to skip on ahead to college (and college boys). Rarely do we sit back and enjoy where we are right now. Our twenties and thirties are a time of getting to know ourselves, but just when we are figuring out how to live on our own as adults, our friends start talking about cake-cutting fees and our family begins to question our lack of the ultimate accessory: a husband. Great. How can you feel good about where you are?

Here's the thing: your single days are numbered, and once they're gone, they're gone (barring a divorce, which you smart readers will avoid, having read this book).

What you'll miss about being single



Take it from the late, great Kate (Hepburn): “If you want to sacrifice the admiration of many men for the criticism of one, go ahead, get married.”

1.Going to the gym whenever you want, even at midnight. Nobody is waiting for you to get home.
2.Eating chips and salsa for dinner. Getting married does not a gourmet make, but busting out the chips and salsa for dinner doesn't really work for a guy.
3.Plucking your eyebrows for hours on end without someone asking what the heck is going on in there.
4.Going out after work with friends without having to call home to “check in.” A wedding band doesn't mean you'll never go out for happy hour, but it does mean calling to make sure it's cool with your hubby (in an evolved, non-permission-slip-type way).
5.The grass is always greener (admissions from anonymous married women)

“If I were single again, I would really learn how to flirt. I feel like I got married before I really grew into my body. I would love to go out and really go for it.”

“Sure, I love my husband, but sometimes I wish I could blink my eyes and he would be gone. I don't want him to die, I just want him to not exist for a little so I could be single again and just worry about myself.”

“I was so worried about never getting married that I married the first guy who showed interest in me. We're happy together, but I wonder if I had just waited a bit longer, where would I be

Why being unmarried rocks



1.You aren't in an unhappy marriage. We repeat: you aren't in an unhappy marriage. Married couples may seem like they have it all, but you have no idea what happens behind closed doors.
2.You can do what you want when you want. Feel like leaving a papier-mâché project unfinished on the dining table? Do it. Want to watch an entire season of Grey's Anatomy in one sitting? Do it!
You never know when or where you are going to meet the next guy you'll fall madly in love (or lust) with, so every day is another day that it could happen. That's pretty cool.
3.A first date doesn't pee with the bathroom door open. (If he does, head for the hills!)
4.You have more time to hang with all of your obnoxious girlfriends--you know, the ones your boyfriends never like but you think are hilarious.
No in-laws. 'Nuff said.
5.Hookups! You can flirt the night away with a guy just for fun even if you have no interest in him. You can even make out with him.
All of your hard-earned cash can be spent on priority number one: you.
No stinky man laundry.
6.You can move to another city just because you like its name without having to worry about whether or not he wants to go or if he'll be able to find a job.

Solve This Puzzle

The solver gets a free trip for two to la-la land

Try this-


I m a 7 letter CITY
234 letter is Bird
61 is cool 1274 is a part of a face (LIPS)
4713 is way of saying good (
4 is equal to 5

Futile

The more I try to Grab...

The lesser I get

The more I try to hurt others...

Am injured more and more...

The more I try to run the race...

The slower I get.....

The more I try to build my beautiful world...

The harsher reality gets....

Oh the Futility of it all!!!!!

Commitment Phobia......

Why Are Men Commitment phobic?? Why does the topic of marraige scare away even the smartest of them:)

What do they lose anyway-They get to keep their surnames, their locations, their jobs, their homes, their everything....

They talk of losing Independence....But whenever I see my married friends-both guys and gals -its the wife who rushes back home early to cook dinner, to clean the house for the party, to greet the visiting in-laws....It is the wife who has to be careful about wat she wears in presence of whom, it the wife who has to answer questions like-" when do u plan to start a family".....


When will guys learn to accept that pleasures in life come with their share of responbilities -and one cant have the former without the latter- Is it too much to ask anyways??

Sleeping?...Alone???

Heard this statement for the nth time today- "women sleep around to get favours, raises, promotions etc".....
I wonder wat the man is doing when a woman is supposedly sleeping with him-checking his emails?? Is he not a part of the act? Is he being raped? Why does he allow himself to be used if at all he is being used....
I wonder if this is a language issue or a perception issue......

Bibin speaketh.....

Bibin is my unit of Whackiness- I consider myself being rated as 0.5- Bibin.....

I have discovered the Whacky side of me by being in conversation with Bibin- we start with talking abt nothing and then move on to variety of topics- with our conversations ending with both of us expressing sorrow on the ignorance, stupidities and general follies of people around us.... The idea being that by projecting ourselves as better than the rest of the world- we make a nice cosy world around us and dump our stresses away-this is a wonderful recipe for bursting stress provided u know the euphoric effect needs to be discarded as soon as the conversation ends.
So you can try the Bibin Rating for your self and see how you fare....Just close your eyes and think how shabby the world is as compared to your own glorius self....

For the casual visitor-Bibin is a human being belonging to the male variety with an extraordinary sense of humour....am not linking his blog -find it yourself.....
And yes to give you an example for our whacky conversations- here are some smart words spoken by my whacky mentor-

1. U r the bright and the brighter and the brightest

2.Innocence starts with you

3.I am only older- u r OLD

4.U r much too intelligent to become my fan

5.I only crib that women don't notice me enough

6. The word "crib" came from womankind only

7.I am the most non-meanie present ever- Amen to that

The Moment

"I don't want to lose you" -He knew he was too late but he wanted her to know.

She didnt turn back-"I was never yours to lose."

He went out and stood in the rain, the raindrops washed away his tears.

The world around him seemed to have become a blur-Sometimes the simplest things are

the most difficult to understand............

Why...Oh Why

My list of Whys-These are questions that I have every now and then....And the Answer to all of them seems to be the irritating "Murphy's Law"-You can add ur list too...

WHY:

1. Does my comp crash when I have a deadline to meet..
2. Do escalation mails go to the entire world and mails of appreciation(precious and rare) come to me in Isolation
3. Does the Cab either leave or gets filled just when I am about to step in
4. Do problems and fires happen at office when I am on a Vacation
5. The outgoing calls get blocked when I have a imp call to make
6. The server goes down when I am booking my flight tickets
7. Does any guy who seems remotely interesting fall in love with someone else within a week of meeting me
8. When everything seems fine-does my friend calls me up and tells me about their new job in my dream company with a dream package

Well I guess Mr Murphy was a smart person- He gave us an answer to many generic questions and thus prevented a scope of cribbing of how unfair the world is

Frustating...

Actions speak louder than words- and I belive that
Words have their own significance too.....

But What does one do-when there are neither words not any action or activity....

Just the silence and you and him......the eyes speak volumes too but I don't want to read them....I want something more concrete, more voluble.....


And I deserve it too........

And....

"Are u sure you want this" -there was a trace of anger in his voice. It irked him that she needed him so less-her decision was made.

" You know the answer-dont u"-She was knitting- a pink and white pattern- her fingers kept on moving as if by magic knotting, twisting ,rolling the wool-while she spoke.

He tried to keep his voice steady-"Do you understand the significance, the consequences could be severe"

She stopped....and Looked up...

" There is a beautiful land in my dreams, where I work to make my life happy, where I am independent of identities, where I make my own choices.....But this will not remain a dream .....And my baby will be born in this land.....And that is MY choice"

He remained quiet-there was nothing to say

Monday Blues

Ok Monday - am back for our tryst again.....

I know you hate me and the feeling is completely mutual

Don't show me your face again for the next 6 days...

And let me tell U- You don't Daunt me at all- Try as hard as you can- I wish I could

avoid you though:)

I, ME, Myself

Yeah I found this on Shreya's Blog and went for it myself- My Dating Report Card is the Funniest:)
And the Smartness Index is to show my Mom:)she used to teach me Economics and used to get frustated trying to make me understand Giffen's Paradox:)

All-Around Smart You are all-around smart. Essentially, that means that you are a good combination of your own knowledge and experience, along with having learned through instruction - and you are equally as good with theoretical things as you are with real-world, applied things. You have a well-rounded brain. 0% applied intelligence 0% learned intelligence

Take this quiz at QuizGalaxy.com

mishi -- [noun]: A person with a taste for acorns 'How will you be defined in the dictionary?' at QuizGalaxy.com

'What will your obituary say?' at QuizGalaxy.com

Take this quiz at QuizGalaxy.com

YOUR DATING REPORT CARD:
Category	Grade
Flirting	A
Physical	D
Emotional	B
Your Average Dating Grade: B
'What is your Dating Grade?' at QuizGalaxy.com

That Moment

He held her hand tightly -they were in the cab...The radio was on in full blast- KK crooned "kal rahe ya na rahe kal...pal yaad aayenge yeh pal"....
Irony- She thought- and smiled to herself....There were so many things that they needed to tell each other.....But sometimes words are inadequate to express feelings....so they kept quiet.....
She kept looking out of the window- pretending to be interested in the landscape outside-
He kept playing with his cell phone........
"hum rahe ya na rahe kal....yaad aayenge yeh pal"-went on KK.........
The Cab screeched to a halt-It was time.......
The airport was crowded as always....but they could see only each other....They Hugged each other -loath to let each other go- And Quietly flowed the tears.....
Yes words were not adequate-nor were they required....

Random Musings

Why do I feel so uneasy today....like something is waiting to happen- something not so good, not welcome....Is it my mind playing tricks or is it my all time reliable Gut trying to tell me something. Tried to do Pranayam -but its not helping.......
For someone who is always confident about everything- this is a anomaly......
Hold my hand Time, make me feel Myself....give me your Strength and Patience......and Understanding
I am not scared of Faltering or Failing, Am scared of not being able to spring back.....
The Writing on my grave should be"She Tried Always......"

Whose AD is it Anyways....

Havent Seen Anything Like this since Coke-Pepsi Warfare

Men Don't Understand

A man was sitting on the edge of the bed, observing his wife turning back and forth,

looking at herself in the mirror.

Since her birthday was not far off, he asked what she'd like to have

for her Birthday.

I'd like to be six again, she replied, still looking in the mirror.

On the morning of her Birthday, he arose early, made her a nice big

bowl of Lucky Charms, and then took her to Six Flags theme park. What a day!

He put her on every ride in the park; the Death Slide, the Wall of Fear, the

Screaming Monster Roller Coaster... everything there was.

Five hours later they staggered out of the theme park.

Her head was reeling and her stomach felt upside down.

He then took her to a McDonald's where he ordered her a Happy Meal

with extra fries and a chocolate shake.

Then it was off to a movie, popcorn, a soda pop, and her favorite

candy,M&M's.

What a fabulous adventure !

Finally she wobbled home with her husband and collapsed into bed

exhausted.

He leaned over his wife with a big smile and lovingly asked, Well

Dear, what was it like being six again ? ?

Her eyes slowly opened and her expression suddenly changed.

I meant my Dress Size, you dumb ass!!


The moral of the story: Even when a man is listening, he is going to
get it wrong.

Am Tagged

And pretty Excited too.....:)
An IDEA has changed my life- and for Good- Thanks Buddy:)


1. Pick out a scar you have, and explain how you got it-

Right on the tip of my nose- an ugly pox mark- am pretty conscious of it-As it is I have a blunt nose and there is this ugly scar sitting on top of it...

2. What is on the walls in your room?

Nothing at all......there are a whole lot of things- paintings, artifacts, wallhangings lying all over the floor and lofts and many such other places- all meant to be put up on the walls some day...right now its the blank emptiness which stares back at me......At one point I used to paint regularly and all my paintings duly found their way to my walls....And then one day someone gifted me a painting set...And soon he walked out of my life...haven't painted since then......


3. What does your phone look like?

Grey, cool and Sleek-( it had better be- given that its cost me a bomb)....Am one of those who uses a phone for nearly everything....for calling and receiving messages, for clicking snaps, to use as a paper weight,as a alarm clock, a game set , torch.....so despite being a year old and very badly used- it still shines....
Darling- Wat would i do without u:)


4. What music do you listen to?

Ahem most of the time am listening to myself singing ( if it can be called that:)) Apart from that -its always Kishore Da...

5. What is your current desktop picture?

A cutie sweety kitty- brown in color with blue eyes...feels good to see this wonder of nature while starting the day...reminds me of home.........and my pets

6. What do you want more than anything right now?

A phone call from someone- its been more than 48 hours and I am still waiting


7. Do you believe in gay marriage?

Not just Gay- i believe in Lesbian Marriages too-if you find your soulmate- its not imp even to get married...just being together is beautiful too......

8. What time were you born?

9.00pm....9th oct...the number nine seems to be very imp for me.......nowadays I get up at 9.00 am and sleep at 9.00pm

9. Are your parents still together?

Oh Yes....they are my fav couple- they love, share, care, have arguments, agree to disagree and complement each other so beautifully


10. What are you listening to?

Bangla Band Bhumi's -"Barandaye Roddur......"


11. Do you get scared of the dark?

I join my feline friends in being extremely active @ Night.....never known what fear is- be it Darkness or light....

12. The last person to make you cry?

It doesnt take much for me to cry- The last time was the movie" Rang De Basanti"- I saw it for the 3rd time- And Yet quietly flowed the Tears

13. What is your favorite perfume/cologne?

An evening in Paris- Yes am old fashioned:)

14. What kind of hair/eye colour do you like on the opposite sex?

Brown soft Eyes.....soft silky hair......


15. Do you like pain killers?

Am not fond of the medicinal variety- dont take them unless as a last resort...
There are other painkillers or joy makers-as u can name them- a baby's toothless smile, a cute kitty's antics, a soulful piece of music- I am addicted to them


16. Are you too shy to ask someone out?

Hmmmm really depends on the person....usually go by gut feeling .....


17. Favorite pizza topping?

Mushrooms and olives....Am not too fond of pizzas though

18. If you could eat anything right now, what would it be?

Fish, Fish, Fish and Fish:)

19. Who was the last person you made mad?

Peeps and Sameer- Both of them got back at me in their own ways- and I enjoyed myself thoroughly:)

20. Is anyone in love with you?

I guess so- YES...........



And I Tag Bibin....don't want to trouble anyone else:)

Office Romance Nuances.........

In this day and age, most people spend as much time at work with their colleagues as they do outside of work socialising with friends. Because of this, many individuals turn to the workplace to find romance. This phenomenon is no surprise. Now, it’s almost acceptable! But don’t get bogged down if the romance is about to fizzle. Here’s how you could deal with the tough situation with dignity and grace. DO keep your relationship out of the office. Hopefully, you will have already set ground rules about what is appropriate inside the walls of your company. This means you and your partner have steered clear of public displays of affection throughout your relationship. Apply this same rule if you breakup. Don’t discuss about your failed relationship. Any display of emotional discourse between the two of you will only make you look unprofessional - and will be certain to set off the gossip mill of the company.

DON’T get nasty or resort to name calling or bad mouthing. In most breakups, one of the perks is being able to say nasty things about your ex to your friends. In a situation where the two of you share friends and colleagues, however, the rules change. The last thing your company needs is a he said, she said war going on in the office, so bite your tongue and save your criticisms for your friends outside of work. DO remember that your job is your first priority. One reason so many company executives and human resources employees shudder at the thought of interoffice relationships is the effect they have on company productivity. Breaking up does lead to an emotional upheaval, but don’t let it keep you from doing your work.

Everyone has to face a difficult personal situation and still go on with life - how you handle yours will show others how committed you are to your career and your company’s success. DON’T be harsh in the office - The tricky thing about dating a co-worker is the fact that after a breakup, you still have to see him or her during the workday. This makes office romance breakups even more difficult than others. As painful as it may be to run into your ex at the coffee machine or sit across from him or her at a monthly staff meeting, try to put your personal feelings aside and handle yourself with dignity and professionalism. DO keep your emotions to yourself. Emotions run high during breakups, but you will fare much better in the long run if you keep a lid on them in the office. DON’T play teenager relationship games. These have no place in any adult relationship, much less in the office. Most people can see right through these displays and will think less of you as a professional if you indulge in them. DO think twice about jumping into another office romance.

While office romances don’t always end up in the gutter, there are a wide range of complications that these relationships entail. Chances are you will save yourself a great deal of complications in the long run!

Provoked

Oh Yes I was.....Big Time......
And I had a very good reason for it...I wonder why he did wat he did- that is stare unabashedly at my twin assets...The bloke had come for a interview with Microsoft....For a minute I thought I was mistaken.....But of course I realized the guy was upto no good....
The interview lasted for exactly 7 mins- my shortest yet.
I got a vicious pleasure writing the Regret e-mail- sugarcoating it appropriately - telling him how we don't have a place for him.I wish I could have told him - "we need people with stronger moral fibre dude".

A passing thought came to my mind- what would have the situation been had I been interviewed by him- well I guess i would have had more freedom to slap him.

I take pride in the fact that I am a woman- Independent, Smart and Brave-I don't need a man to protect me, buy me diamonds or a house or a car- I can do that myself.
I need a man to be friends with me, to be a soulmate , to be a companion...nothing more- nothing less.I can be your Best Friend- and your Worst Enemy too-And I am a prototype -of everyone of my type...
The smile on my face is not a sign of weakness-its our strength....

Don't even try to tamper with my dignity- the last time a person tried that- a colleague- he was out of his job in less than two hours......
And that is just a mild repurcussion.......

10 reasons why I love Peeps

Of course he is not going to like this at all- since when have I cared about his threats anyways:)

1. He is my best buddy and yet the wierdest

2. When I tell him I have broken off with my boyfriend and need his shoulder to cry on - his response his "do u think a pink shirt goes well with white trousers?"

3. He calls me in the middle of the night to ask me how much does a xbox 360 cost and how much of discount would I be able to get him-(Bill Gates loves u dude:)

4. He cant keep a secret to save his life- he tells me his and then later wonders how did I know that- he tells mine to the entire world- and then comes and tells me- this is wat the others r telling about u

5.Elephants r more sensitive( am not sure elephants like the comparison)- u have to actually tell him- boss I took offence at wat u said to make him understand

6. Doesnt know or stand ceremonies or formalities - his idea of inviting u is to say- wat time does ur flight land @ bombay:)

7. Ask him - do u think i am fat- response- "not at all"- I smile and feel happy- next sentence " that is to say- am keeping adnan sami as a benchmark".........

8.Loves to Hate bongs:)

9. Blunt to the core- Ask him why he didnt reply to ur mail- pat comes the reply- ur mail goes to the junk folder and i check tht one last

10. Last but most imp-despite everything- he is happier than you when u say- u have won a award at office and the smile on his face is genuine-24karats gold:)

Categories of Urbane Women

Sometime later I would like to classify guys as well-




Miss Sweet

Miss Sweet is a woman who's positive, content with her life, always upbeat — and just a blast to be around. She's a genuine person without a bitch bone in her body. She's always truly happy to see you and you find yourself looking forward to spending time with her. Miss Sweets are usually snapped up out of the dating market right away, so they're pretty rare. But if you can find one, you've got a real treasure on your hands.

Miss Equality

This type of woman is a true feminist — not one of the radical man-haters, or the hypocritical pseudo-feminists who think that equality means "I demand equal rights and an equal salary, but a man still has to pay for me." The Miss Equalitys of the world genuinely like men, and understand that equality means equality across the board, from holding the door open to fighting on the front lines. They believe that a relationship should be a 50/50 partnership, and are more than willing to shoulder their half of the responsibilities and dating expenses — just because it's the right thing to do.

Miss Sexual

You should be so lucky to encounter one of these! Miss Sexual loves men and loves sex — and makes no bones about it. She's not selling it, she's not using it as a tool to manipulate men — she just naturally craves it. Miss Sexual is not to be confused with a nymphomaniac, who suffers from psychological problems — rather, she has somehow bypassed the female societal training of auctioning off the use of her vagina to the highest bidder. For this reason, most other women hate her, because she's giving it away free of charge. But men love her because she's a free spirit who's actually honest about her sex drive. Very rare, but worth searching the ends of the earth for.

Miss Best Friend

Closely aligned with Miss Sweet, Miss Best Friend is another joy to be around. She's the kind of woman you're totally in sync with — you like the same things, watch the same TV shows, enjoy going to the same places. You can spend five minutes with her and think you've known her for years. She's always on your side, laughs at all your jokes and calls you just to say "hi" because she genuinely misses you. She's great just to hang with. A word of warning, though — with Miss Best Friend, you have to make your sexual interest known from day one because if she gets it into her head that you are going to be "just friends," it's almost impossible to change her mind.

Miss Straightforward

This is the type of woman who knows how to communicate. With Miss Straightforward, there are no games, no expecting men to be mind readers, no behavior based on ridiculous, female-biased advice from articles in Cosmo or The Rules. Miss Straightforward will pick up the phone and ask you out. She will do what she says she will do — not say one thing and do just the opposite. Although she may be blunt at times, at least you'll know where you stand and you'll never have to spend hours trying to decode contradictory or emotion-based female behavior.

Miss Independent

This is a good woman to find if you don't have a lot of time to invest in a relationship or you're the type of guy who needs a lot of space. Miss Independent has a real life of her own and is happily going in her own positive direction. She's the type who wants a man in her life, but doesn't need a man in her life. And she certainly isn't looking for men to solve all her problems or blame when things don't go her way.

Miss No Pressure

While many women are chomping at the bit to get married, Miss No Pressure hasn't fallen prey to any such agenda. She's happy just to be with you. So you don't get any "Where is our relationship going?" or hint-dropping about the future or window-shopping at the jewelry store. She may want to get married at some point, but she's in no hurry — she thinks that if it happens, it will just happen naturally.

Miss Secure

Miss Secure accepts herself as she is and is comfortable with her good points, as well as her bad. And she feels the same about you. Miss Secure doesn't need constant attention to shore up a sagging ego, has tons of self-esteem and is always going in her own positive direction.

Miss Personality

Miss Personality is a great find. She might not be up for first prize in a beauty contest (although she could be), but her intelligence, wit and sparkling presence just light up the room, and she draws people like a magnet. Her personality is so charming that it easily overcomes any deficiencies she might have in the looks department, just because she's so great to be with.

Miss Low-Maintenance

The rarest of the rare, Miss Low-Maintenance is the most atypical of modern women. She really doesn't care about how much money you have — she just likes you for yourself and not for what she can take from you. She's likely to be a true feminist, and will gladly pay her share of the dating expenses. If you can find a Miss Low-Maintenance, hang on to her for dear life!

Miss Right for You

A lot of guys choose women who are "arm candy" — good-looking trophy girlfriends who bolster their status among other men or counteract their own insecurities. That's all well and good, but if you find a woman who makes you happy, regardless of looks, age or social status — or what any other guy thinks — then you have definitely won at the mating game.

Mishi U r Happy:)

I took a quiz on how " Are you a Goddess of Happiness" and the results are quite flattering



Congratulations. You are a goddess of happiness. You have a zest for life, and always see the glass half full. You're the woman who lights up a room when you enter and whose attention everyone wants. You genuinely love and respect yourself and others, and don't mind showing it off with your cool confidence and generous heart. Inside and out, you're the goddess you want to be. Pampering yourself with a day off or a soothing massage nurtures your spirit. Goddess, keep shining your light wherever you go, and remember to spread your infectious laugh to others as well. When you share your secrets of joy with friends and family, you become the supreme goddess of happiness.

when I was born

At the time when I was born,
I had no friends, no enemies,
Didn’t have any plans,
Nor had any memories,
All that I had was,
Empty space in my mind,
Didn’t know what it was,
To be cruel, to be kind,
I didn’t know what it was,
To be happy, or in pain,
Wasn’t even aware,
Of what was Loss, or gain,
It was a pleasant, numb,
Shapeless, flawless existence,
But as I grew up,
It lost its persistence,
More and more definitions,
Were added to my mind,
And the pure truth,
Became harder to find,
Differentiation became,
The basis of perceptions,
There were rules, and more rules,
But with exceptions,
The magnitude of complexity,
Went higher and higher,
The purpose of existence,
Flew higher and higher,


To be continued......

Random Thought

Dont let someone become a priority in your life when you are just an option in their life....

My Seduction Style-

Blame it All on Peepu- I gave in to the temptation and checked this out...Man is that me!!!!1

7 Tactics for women to call it Quits

"Sayonara." "Get lost." "We need to talk..." Whether you're looking to lessen the sting or hit 'em with your best shot, the following techniques are sure to accomplish the trickiest part of any relationship: ending it.

The "We Need to Talk" Talk
A State of the Union address is recommended for anyone wishing to secede, so to speak, with some semblance of dignity.
Pros: Talking things over can soothe hurt feelings and potentially salvage the friendship.
Cons: Brace yourself for histrionics, notes Lynda Twardowski, 31, from Traverse City, MI. "When I finally managed to peel the guy off me, tears streamed down his face and he babbled like a madman."
Ouch factor: Three Band-Aids

The "Dear John"
Who needs a messy confrontation when a note, email or well-timed voice mail can spare you from having to witness the devastation?
Pros: Composing your thoughts lets you control the situation. "I'm a big fan of the 'Dear John' letter," says Megan Lane Patrick, age 30, of Cincinnati. "That way, I can make all my points without crying or forgetting what I want to say."
Cons: Sure, it's the coward's route. But, considering you'll likely be vilified regardless, what's one more strike against you?
Ouch factor: Two Band-Aids

The Downsize
Going on hiatus gives you the green light to see other people while letting you ease out of the relationship under the guise of "needing space."
Pros: A time-out isn't as catastrophic as a full-fledged breakup, since it offers a sliver of hope that the relationship might eventually resume. Plus, it leaves the door open for booty calls.
Cons: Having to envision each other with someone else is emotionally taxing for lovers in limbo. "Every time I went on a new date, I kept wondering if she was out with someone new, too," says Mike Fowler, 33, of Los Angeles. "It drove me nuts."
Ouch factor: Two Band-Aids

The Fizzle
Whether you conveniently "forget" an anniversary or wait days to return an email, your general apathy will soon make it obvious that your boots are made for walkin'.
Pros: If you're on the same page, the mutual fade-out can be painless, says Lynn Reynolds, 32, of Covington, KY: "We told each other, 'Give me a call,' but we knew we'd had enough of each other. Neither of us called and there were no hurt feelings."
Cons: Some people just don't get subtle brush-offs. If your ex is the determined sort, you'll need to invest in caller ID.
Ouch factor: One Band-Aid

Dumping by Proxy
Not keen on the business of crushing souls? In the immortal words of Dionne Warwick, that's what friends are for.
Pros: Passing the buck is easier than getting your own hands dirty. Heck, maybe your friend and your ex will hit it off!
Cons: You're only adding insult to injury by having a random third party be witness to your ex's humiliation, as Jessica Callahan, 32, from Bristol, CT, attests. "I was shocked and embarrassed," she notes, after her boyfriend's buddy told her she was history. "But I wasn't angry. That would come later when I realized it was the only explanation I would get."
Ouch factor: Four Band-Aids

The Blame Game
Breaking up is easier when you can provoke the other person to initiate it for you.
Pros: Abdicating all responsibility puts you in the clear, says Michele Pezzuti, 31, of Staten Island, NY: "I waited till my boyfriend did something minor, then made a big stink about it so he could be to blame, thus making the breakup his fault."
Cons: Heaping guilt on someone else just to avoid your own verges on "evil genius" territory. Yet if your partner has the patience of a saint, getting him or her to dump you can be near i impossible.
Ouch factor: Three Band-Aids

The Alien Abduction
Of course, if all else fails, consider the good old-fashioned vanishing act.
Pros: Hiding lets you avoid confrontation, notes Angela Gleeson, 25, of Newburgh, NY, who remembers her own "one that got away" in the very literal sense. "He was supposed to get to my place at 8, and he just never showed. I called him several times, but he never called back. I've never heard from him since."
Cons: You'll invariably leave your ex wondering if you got in an accident or were kidnapped, prompting him or her to show up at your place in a frenzy or call the cops to report a missing person. Plus, you'll feel like a total heel if you ever accidentally cross paths with that person again.
Ouch factor: Five Band-Aids


Authored by-Amy Helmes and Meg Leder

Myths about Women

The Seven Myths Men Believe about Women

Women are never satisfied

Women are high maintenance

Women want to control men

Women are jealous and possessive

Women are too emotional

Women who appear to be strong and competent don't need to be taken care of

Women want to rob men of their freedom

Men.............

1. The nice men are ugly.

2. The handsome men are not nice.

3. The handsome and nice men are gay.

4. The handsome, nice, and heterosexual men are married.

5. The men who are not so handsome, but are nice men, have no money.

6. The men who are not so handsome, but are nice men with money think we are only after their money.

7. The handsome men without money are after our money.

8. The handsome men, who are not so nice and somewhat heterosexual, don't think we are beautiful enough.

9. The men who think we are beautiful, that are heterosexual, somewhat nice and have no money, are cowards.

10. The men who are somewhat handsome, somewhat nice and have money and thank God are straight, are shy and NEVER MAKE THE FIRST MOVE!!!

11. The men who never make the first move, automatically lose interest in us when we take the initiative.


NOW...WHO THE HELL UNDERSTANDS MEN.....

Panchali

And I thought I was born lucky.....but then who wouldnt....
Am a princess by birth, daughter of a great and powerful king, I have been told I am beautiful, charming and accomplished- I am not arrogant but do possess a self esteem and pride born out of my self worth. Many a times when I would sit at the lotus garden at the feet of my father-he would stroke my head and tell me" My krishnaa, you r my strength-I dream of a future as bright as the dazzle of your eyes for you"

On those occassions I have always managed to hide my tears- for I had always been told that the future of a princess is a palace far far away in some distant realm. And yet when I grew older those dreams began to have a attraction -along with the distant palace I began to dream of a handsome , charming, sensitive , brave prince......he would wed me, and take me away and we would weave a world of love.....

And today I thought my dreams were going to be true.....Although the prince had lost his kingdom, but he retained his strength, his charm and magnetism.....For a split second just before he proved his valour at the court hall-he had looked up at me- bedecked in bridal finery I was waiting in sweet anticipation with my maids- and our eyes met-it was a split second.....but it seemed like a million years to me....My life, my fate,destiny , desires, aspirations were to be decided in the next few minutes that followed- but I was almost mesmerised by his burning eyes and the hint of a smile on his face......the next few hours passed in a blur-I was in a euphoric state of mind.......My prince had won me...and the time had come to go away to the distant realm , to my land of dreams....

I heard whispers, excited murmurs all around me..."Kunti's son...Arjun...Pandava..she is lucky......" Yes i thought so too....The brave prince, the handsome warrior who had captured the imagination of every young girl in the country had won me..."Oh krishna u r so lucky" .....everyone said.....And I thought I was....I had already fallen in love....He too looked captivated....And then I saw them....The four brothers....They were there- standing showering flowers on us as we were getting married...I looked at them and a passing thought came..something ..some recognition of a emotion on their face...but it wentas soon as it had come-I couldnt be bothered to analyse their feelings...I was building my own world......And that was the beginning of the End....

They knocked....I was waiting ...my face covered with a veil as expected of a bride...My Arjun beside me...the old lady- my mother-in-law must be performing her evening prayers I was told..They knocked again-this time a reply came from inside-a sweet but tired voice- "oh u have returned my sons.....What have you brought today..." And someone spoke -I am not sure who-
" something special for you"....she replied...from within..."Whatever it is -share it amongst yourself equally-As Always"
Was it the sound of my heart that beat loudly protesting against the mistake or was it a gasp from my newly wedded husband.....??
Was it my strength or my weakness that I did not swoon, that I stood there like a rock-witnessing my humiliation-scene by scene.....Actually on hindsight-I think it was my optimism that refused to die out even in the last few minutes- till the die was finally cast......I still foolishly expected some laughter, some humour, some banter and then a clarification about the mistake made by mother...And I waited...still not daring to look at my husband...now I admit somewhere in my deepest of thoughts I always knew the truth - but was scared to admit it.......And I waited foolishly-And then came the verdict...." As you say mother-your wish is our command"......
Even as I listened stunned-I was hit by an instant sense of realisation and recognition -the look on their faces- during the wedding-when they were showering flowers-something that I had missed earlier- It wasnt happiness or joy, it wasnt pride, it was Lust- Pure naked undisguised Lust.......

For the second time in the evening I looked at my husband again- And I was not too surprised to see him looking-not angry, not humilated, not guilty....But there was a sense of Extreme Relief..............

And thus I became Panchali.......

The Wait

He told me to wait for him- I did. It has been five years since then, I am still waiting.

I know this is futile , but atleast I have something to pray for at the end of each day and something to look forward to at the beginning of each day

Mouse Story

Mouse Story ... Or Our Story

Mouse Story ... A mouse looked through the crack in the wall to see the farmer and his wife open a package. "What food might this contain?" The mouse wondered - he was devastated to discover it was a mousetrap. Retreating to the farmyard, the mouse proclaimed the warning. "There is a mousetrap in the house! There is a mousetrap in the house!" The chicken clucked and scratched, raised her head and said, "Mr. Mouse, I can tell this is a grave concern to you but it is of no consequence to me. I cannot be bothered by it ." The mouse turned to the pig and told him, "There is a mousetrap in the house! There is a mousetrap in the house!" The pig sympathized, but said, "I am so very sorry, Mr. Mouse, but there is nothing I can do about it but pray. Be assured you are in my prayers." The mouse turned to the buffalo and said, "There is a mousetrap in the house! There is a mousetrap in the house!" The buffalo said, "Wow, Mr. Mouse. I'm sorry for you, but it 's no skin off my nose." So, the mouse returned to the house, head down and dejected, to face the farmer's mousetrap -- alone. That very night a sound was heard throughout the house like the sound of a mousetrap catching it s prey. The farmer's wife rushed to see what was caught. In the darkness, she did not see it was a venomous snake whose tail the trap had caught. The snake b it es the farmer's wife. The farmer rushed her to the hosp it al and she returned home w it h a fever. Everyone knows you treat a fever w it h fresh chicken soup, so the farmer took his hatchet to the farmyard for the soup's main ingredient the Chicken. But his wife's sickness continued, so friends and neighbors came to s it w it h her around the clock. To feed them, the farmer butchered the pig. The farmer's wife did not get well; she died. So many people came for her funeral; the farmer had the buffalo slaughtered to provide enough meat for all of them. The mouse looked upon it all from his crack in the wall w it h great sadness. So, the next time, you hear someone is facing a problem and think it doesn't concern you, remember -- when one of us is threatened, we are all at risk. We are all involved in this journey called life. We must keep an eye out for one another and make an extra effort to encourage one another. REMEMBER: EACH OF US IS A VITAL THREAD IN ANOTHER PERSON'S TAPESTRY; OUR LIVES ARE WOVEN TOGETHER FOR A REASON. One of the best things to hold onto in this world is a friend . : )

Rosa Jaaneman.......

I'm disturbed by the split: Rosa

Rosa's gone to where she is from, Saif tells us.

The much-talked-about, four-year relationship between Saif Ali Khan and his Italian girlfriend Rosa has finally come to an end with Rosa moving back to Switzerland.
Meanwhile, the reason for the Saif-Rosa split isn't known, but rumours are that his growing friendship with Amrita could be one. But it could also be that Rosa's increasing ambition resulted in an ego clash between the two
For months we were told about the details of the acrimonius divorce between Amrita Singh and Saif Ali Khan

Now we have to bear the sob stories of Rosa as well:)

Sometime back there was a news about Raveena Tandon losing her dog

And Ash's first engagement to her third (official) boyfriend for whom this is the 2nd engagement( this guy has a penchant for hooking actresses more successful than him)

Abd then the stories about Shilpa's torture in Big Brother

And Liz Hurley's shaadi to Arun Nayyar

Hey yesterday I saw south superstar Nagarjuna at a disc at Hyderabad-and guess what- this is really sensational i tell u............you won't believe me....he was SNEEZING....I even took a snap on my cell phone..

Right now I am googling to ge the numbers of AAJ TAK to sell my stories to them........

Cricket Mania

Are people crazy? Or I am the one who is insane-I agree that I am not fond of cricket-hence am prone to being biased...
But isnt this going over the top- Mandira's wardrobe for the world cup cricket being discussed-he he ha ha ho ho.....
And the whole dramabaazi of filmstars singing songs to motivate cricketers-he he ha ha ho ho once again.....

Oh god forgive me when I whine, I don't understand Cricket -Does the world cease to be mine????

Buck up Gals- Speak the Truth........

No don't do it for the society....don't do it because some nebulous person said "truth is the right approach" - do it for yourself.

Bharti- The world knows you as Bharti Yadav- you are a educated girl, a modern girl who has soaked in the benefits of a lavish and privilged lifestyle , modern upbringing and good education. You did what any normal young girl is apt to do- Fall in Love. Things went horribly wrong- you have lived with the trauma of losing your beloved, you have gone through the pain of not being able to mourn in peace, you have had to face the unfriendly media glare, you went into hiding. And what's worse is now you have to make the choice of aiding law to help bring the murderers -the people who brutally killed your love- to justice-knowing fully well that they might be your kith and kin.

So far you have been quiet, you seem to be on a change statement mode, a denial mode. But think about it- who are you trying to shield??- a person who has been convicted of being responsible for the murder of a model turned bartender-who was killed for just doing her job- A person who had never shown any remorse or signs of guilt- who openly threatens lawyers and cops about his dad's money and power etc. A father who supports his son no matter what- a son who thinks he has the authority of meddling with his sister's life and brutally killed herlove.
Both you Bharti and you Bhavna-think about it- won't you be better off without people like these in your life. No you dont need to think about Nitish's brutal murder, or the anguish of Jessica's famly or of Nitish's mom running from pillar to post trying to get justice or for millions of people for whom the jessica judgement was a reinstated faith in justice , or the fact that it would not have been possible had some of the witnesses not turned hostile....No you really don't -just think about yourself and your right to live with peace and dignity. Can you not see the bloodstains on the hands of your own kith and kin- Do you think the blood will remain unpaid for-for long??? Did it remain unpaid for-for Lady Macbeth? Can you see a future for yourself keeping these people who call yourself your near and dear ones safe??....Secure your future....live to wake up in a guiltfree morning,ensure that you can look your kids in the eye...without remorse or guilt...

What are you scared of anyways- your current state of existence is anyway a state of nadir- what worse could happen-what have you to lose anyway?? What will you gain by ensuring the safety of a criminal- fear? state of being repressed? mental and physical torture? You owe this much to yourself atleast- the right to be free......

Buck up gals -speak the truth -not for God's sake, not for society's sake, not for justice's sake, not for Nitish's sake,not for Jesscia's sake- but for your own sake- Free Yourself- You deserve it...........

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nitish_Katara

http://www.ndtv.com/template/template.asp?template=nitishkataramurder

http://in.news.yahoo.com/050330/43/2kgu8.html

Fat and fit is better than thin and idle

An Article copied from the Internet- I just loved it for obvious reasons:)



If you are fat (overweight) and fit you are better off health-wise than if you are thin and idle. According to Professor Chris Riddoch, a UK government advisor on its recent physical activity report, 'There is evidence that fat people who achieve cardiovascular fitness through exercise have better health outcomes than lean people who don't.'

Many people in the UK, USA and several other countries are overweight. Many people think that being fit means being lean. We have to stand this idea on its head and focus on being fit, say the experts.

Riddoch said "As long as people see physical activity primarily as a way of losing weight, they are unlikely to keep it up, either because it doesn't achieve that objective quickly or because they think they have to lose weight before they can take up serious exercise. The benefits can be achieved whatever a person's weight."

He goes on to say that the benefits of being fit are usually greater than those of weight loss.

We have to get away from the idea that exercise is something we can only do when we have lost the weight. In fact, we have to look at what we mean by exercise.

WHAT DO WE MEAN BY EXERCISE?

When most of us think of exercise we imagine a cross country runner puffing away, or a muscle man in the gym lifting weights, some of us think of famous sports stars practising their sport. What if we changed that view and thought of 'PHYSICAL ACTIVITY'.

What kind of things could we include in 'physical activity' apart from gyms, athletic tracks and road running? Well, we could include walking, cycling, swimming, more walking down to the shops, using our cars less, gardening, washing the car rather than taking it to the car wash, playing golf without the little electric cart, dancing and houseowork. In fact, if we think of everyday things, most of them involve some form of physical activity.

Now lets take this physical activity to the gym or local sports center and see if there are things fat people could do there without being over self-conscious and embarrassed or worried about not being able to cope. There is swimming, aqua aerobics, static bicycles, rowing machines, beginners exercise classes.

One gadget I bought about a three months ago has completely changed the way I look at physical activity. I bought a Pedometer. It measures how many steps I am taking, adds them up and tells me at the end of the day how many steps I took and how far I walked (more or less). The packet said that if I can take 10,000 steps a day I have done enough physical activity to stay healthy.

I put the pedometer on and carried on as normal. I wanted to see how far I would walk on a normal day. At the end of the first day I sat rather depressed at the end of my bed looking at the reading - I had done a mere 2,800 steps that day. That is just barely one quarter of my target.

The next morning I decided to go and get the newspaper on foot. I usually go by car to a store about one mile away. I did not fancy walking two miles every morning. So, I went to a nearer one that was about 400 yards away. That immediately added about 700 steps the Pedometer. In the evening I took the dog for a walk.

My family noticed I kept looking at this little gadget and asked me what it was. To cut a long story short, we all had a Pedometer within a few days. My wife and I soon took the dog for a walk every evening.

I now walk about 10,000 steps a day. During my lunch break I grab a ten-minute walk. Whenever I am talking on the phone I get up and pace up and down the office floor. I try to walk to all shops and banks, etc. that are less than one mile away.

Basically, all I am doing now is what my parents and grandparents used to do. I am using my legs to get around.

Friends have started using it. It is easy to incorporate ten thousand steps into your everyday life. Most of my friends have managed to maintain their daily targets.
v There is one thing I have notice however, and this may spoil the fat fit versus thin and idle idea. Most of my fat friends who have been using the Pedometer for more than a couple of months have lost a lot of weight. Does this mean that being fat and fit is a bit of a dream - if you are fat and get fit and keep up the exercise, surely you will not stay fat. Opinions welcome.

Anyway, the message is clear - aim for the fitness rather than the slimness if you are aiming for better health.

A call on behalf of Call Centres.......

Why does it take a Shilpa Shetty for a Whole Nation to sit up and take notice for something as serious as Racial Discrimination....Well Discrimination in any form is a highly undesirable phenomenon and should be discouraged. In this case I am surprised at the reactions of the Indian Media and everyone else.....

In fact the fact that we are crying "Foul" over others calling us " brown" etc is really funny- given the fact that our society itself places high premium on fair skinned people and calls them " beautiful" just by the virtue of them being fair.
Also our society is divided in many frgaments on the basis of castes, communities etc...and there is a prvilent norm of people being considered " high" and " low" based on their castes....etc....
But we will come to that later- maybe in a different post.

This time I am more concerned about Racial Discrimination against Indians and more importantly our take on it...

Consider this- A celebrity who is being paid in crores to appear in a reality show goes and puts her foot in her mouth by calling herself Angeline Jolie of Asia etc and also trying to prove herself as more elite than the rest of the showmembers and ends up being targetted -She gets to hear things which are considered unacceptable in the Racial Discrimnation Dictionary. The entire nation, media and even the Govts of the two countries go into a frenzy denouncing the whole thing. The Sponsors of the programme withdraw their support, public sympathy pours in -and finally Shilpa ends up winning the show and bagging many laurels and movie and brand endorsement offers along with a couple of more crores- And the perpetretors of the hate culture in the show came under a lot of flak and fire- I would call it as Good Riddance to Bad Rubbish....Nice Very Nice- Never seen such a apt and quick poetic justice to unfair treatment....

But my question to the Media, to the People of India is - Why Shilpa? Why only Shilpa?? Is she the only one going through such trauma ? Do they know- Are they aware that there are millions of Indians who face abusive language, rude behaviour, hear derisive language in their own country from millions of people all over the World- just for doing their jobs- and these people are based in India- At Bangalore, At Gurgaon- they are young people who do not have a professional degree to be able to bag a higher end job, they belong to different parts of the countries , they are people who have left their homes to earn some money and make a career. They are people who work in the BPO-ITES Industry, some of them have backend data processiing jobs and others take up calls for customers for clients based in USA, UK and the rest of the world.
Their jobs are not easy- they have to work at nights, at odd hours, they have to forsake public holidays and festivals so that they can align to the customers in the other countries, they have to forsake their sundays, their social lives and sometimes even their dignity....Cos their jobs have been outsourced...... Their customers view them as outsiders who have taken away their jobs....and frequently vent their anger on these hapless employees who have no choice but to take it and keep quite- That is considered "professionalism"....
I have been associated with a Call Centre as a HR manager for 6 months - and 6 months was all I could bear - for it was frustating for me to be unable to help this people from their daily trauma of hearing things like: "u indian filth", "u dirty pig", " do u guys worship cows... for us they r beef", how much will u charge for sleeping with me" - the list is endless..........

There was a woman who used to leave her 6 month old baby with her cousin and come to work at night because she needed the money.
There was a lady whose husband had died in the Kargil War and the govt compensation was not enough.
There was a 20 year old boy from a remote poverty striken part of Orissa- who had big dreams .
There was a handicapped boy who was not able to get employment in any other area......

I have spent some sleepless nights thinking of their traumatised sad tales and my and the authorities inabilites to help them out- True we arranged for professional counselling, true we arranged for stress busters on the floor, improved the incentive plans and even put forth a complaint to the Client- But we all knew that this will not stop- because the Calls meant Revenues-Period....

And yes this is true for most Call Centres- after some time the employees get de-sensitized to everything, all slurs and move on with life...

Meanwhile let us take a look at how the Media behaves with this Industry-

There are frequent articles in leading national dailies describing Call Centres are breeding grounds of sleaze, drugs, indecent behaviour - the list goes on.....

Call centre employees are represented as young people earning lots of money early and consequently going astray and getting involved in alchoholism, substance abuse, late night binges and sexcapades. They are portayed as people of lose morals , people who are thieves , people who cant be trusted etc etc- they face problems in getting accomodation and many such services.

Recently there was a case in Delhi- a call centre employee was brutally raped in dhaula kuan- reactions to that incident have been like the following-

#What was she doing out of her house in the middle of the night

#Call centre gals are anyways used to sleeping around- Big deal

#She must have been drunk......

I wonder- even if all of the above is true -does it justify Rape?? Would the reaction have been same had the victim been a housewife with 3 kids??


At the end of the day- this industry generates millions of jobs for people who might have been umemployed or underemployed otherwise.

Attention Media- Can we have a matured outlook and view and not taint an entire industry just for the sake of sensational news reporting?

Just adding a biblical context- the lord said " he who hath not sinned cast the first stone".....Get the drift??

Do a dipstick of other industries and see if instances of alchoholism, substance abuse, romance in workplace etc do not exist?

Shilpa Shetty is just one case- there are millions out there who face racial slurs each day- go out and reach to them- help their voices be heard by the country and the indifferent world....

You have the power- Do justice to it-

Are u listening- Times, NDTV, Aajtak etc etc..........????